The Alexander teacher's paint palette
"All that we are is a result of what we have thought." - Gautama Buddha
During my AT training I got to practice 'the work' on my teachers and fellow trainees who all had more exposure to the technique than just my input. It was a very supportive environment to learn to trust in the work and how effortless things really can be.
Now I find myself in the curious position of teaching students who more often than not have had limited exposure to the technique and are somehow drawn to it from their otherwise busy lives. At first I found the challenge exciting however, as time passes and I give more lessons, I notice that I lose a bit of trust in my work, and in particular how I use my hands in communicating the technique.
Often in these lessons I am not using my hands in the refined way I came to discover in the classroom. Instead I may rely on my words and 'cheat' moves in order to convey a message to my students.
I started to wonder what all this training was for? But as I experienced in the AT classroom, I now experience when I am teaching that my lessons are not merely addressing the body. Through the body and through the mind, the whole "mind body" of the student, and myself, is being addressed and that is possible to approach in so many ways.
In an instant the thoughts of a student can be changed resulting in a complete change of their overall state. With one student in particular, I wasn't sure if I was reaching her. However, this week, she was able to lift up her violin and let go in her left shoulder in a way she had never experienced before. Her shoulder had always been capable of letting go, but what made it possible in that moment? Whilst I can never be sure of the thought processes a student has, my belief is that along with many other thoughts and experiences that make her who she is, we had also been cultivating the thought during our lessons, that she is safe to let go with me in this space. And the result was this new experience.
So whilst I learnt so many valuable techniques in the AT classroom, what I am actually discovering while teaching is that I can be, and in a sense must be, very creative in the way I go about inviting change in the 'mind body' of my students. I learnt the basic primary colours in my training with some ideas for how to mix the colours as well. But depending on my own internal landscape, the canvas in front of me and the landscape I am taking in, in my lessons now I am discovering the variations of my very own paint palette. Sometimes it can be a black and white sketch that takes more and more form each week. Sometimes it can be a small explosion of colour in one part of the canvas that remains for the weeks to come and starts to spread. Sometimes the colours fade in the week and I am revisiting and touching up.
But what remains the same is that the foundation of any lesson is trust. Trust in this work, trust in myself, trust in my student. A dear colleague reminded me during this crisis of confidence that even if I lose trust in everything else something I know without a doubt is how much this work has impacted my life for the better. She's absolutely right!
Journaling prompts: What are my creative outlets in life? How large a part does trust play in my creative process? How do the thoughts I have impact my creative output?
