Top travel destination, here and now!
“A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.” - Lao Tzu
This time of year isn't the easiest for me. I often find myself dissatisfied with life, thinking that somehow it should be more.
And so there we were, the day after Christmas, heading towards the public indoor swimming pool in my husband's home town, dreaming together about where our future holiday destinations might be. He suggested north west France, I suggested English lake district, we finally agreed on Croatia. What about Portugal? Before we even set off on our imagined holiday, there's so much tension in the air. Balancing expectations, inevitable disappointments. What miserable travelers we might be. All because we were getting ahead of ourselves. FM Alexander referred to this very human phenomenon as 'end-gaining'.
I came face to face with end-gaining for years during my Alexander technique training and, of course, will continue to for the rest of my days. In the classroom, coming to sit in a chair was my Portugal. How could I arrive in Portugal, or the chair, without getting ahead of myself. Could it be ok if rather than Portugal, we did in fact end up in Croatia? Could it be ok if rather than jumping into the sea from the cliffs off of France we ended up at the local swimming pool?
And that is where we found ourselves, for the first time as a family of 4. And without realizing it, we had everything we needed to have the most beautiful travel experience. We were surrounded by this element of water and got to experience ourselves and each other in a completely new way. Much like an Alexander technique lesson! I am so glad I had the capacity and wisdom to realize in real time that this was what was happening, as an incredible sensation of wellbeing and connection overcame us as we played and laughed and floated quietly in this retro swimming pool. Each of us in our own experience, but together. I left that pool feeling so refreshed and light hearted. Exactly how I wish to feel after a holiday.
So that's my wish for this new family unit I find myself in. Rather than getting overwhelmed imagining family holidays, handling toddler tantrums and managing various expectations and disappointments, I look forward to these moments of letting go, and the pleasurable feeling this brings. Being with the people I love most in the world, knowing that there's nothing more I need and nowhere else I would rather be.
Journaling prompts: Where do you find yourself planning for the future? What would happen if you were to let go of that idea? What does letting go feel like for you?
